SavvySugar

Round-up: Kills Weeds and Humans

cheekyredhead — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 14:42:13 -0700

Weed-Whacking Herbicide Proves Deadly to Human Cells
By Crystal Gammon and Environmental Health News

New research has found that an 'inert' ingredient in the herbicide Roundup can kill human embryonic, placental, and umbilical cord cells.

Used in yards, farms and parks throughout the world, Roundup has long been a top-selling weed killer. But now researchers have found that one of Roundup’s inert ingredients can kill human cells, particularly embryonic, placental and umbilical cord cells.

The term “inert ingredient” is often misleading, according to Caroline Cox, research director of the Center for Environmental Health, an Oakland-based environmental organization. Federal law classifies all pesticide ingredients that don’t harm pests as “inert,” she said. Inert compounds, therefore, aren’t necessarily biologically or toxicologically harmless – they simply don’t kill insects or weeds.

Controversy about the safety of the weed killer recently erupted in Argentina, one of the world’s largest exporters of soy.

Last month, an environmental group petitioned Argentina’s Supreme Court, seeking a temporary ban on glyphosate use after an Argentine scientist and local activists reported a high incidence of birth defects and cancers in people living near crop-spraying areas. Scientists there also linked genetic malformations in amphibians to glysophate.

In addition, last year in Sweden, a scientific team found that exposure is a risk factor for people developing non-Hodgkin lymphoma.

Glyphosate, Roundup’s active ingredient, is the most widely used herbicide in the United States. About 100 million pounds are applied to U.S. farms and lawns every year, according to the EPA.

Until now, most health studies have focused on the safety of glyphosate, rather than the mixture of ingredients found in Roundup. But in the new study, scientists found that Roundup’s inert ingredients amplified the toxic effect on human cells-even at concentrations much more diluted than those used on farms and lawns.

One specific inert ingredient, polyethoxylated tallowamine, or POEA, was more deadly to human embryonic, placental and umbilical cord cells than the herbicide itself – a finding the researchers call “astonishing.”

“This clearly confirms that the [inert ingredients] in Roundup formulations are not inert,” wrote the study authors from France’s University of Caen. “Moreover, the proprietary mixtures available on the market could cause cell damage and even death [at the] residual levels” found on Roundup-treated crops, such as soybeans, alfalfa and corn, or lawns and gardens.

The research team suspects that Roundup might cause pregnancy problems by interfering with hormone production, possibly leading to abnormal fetal development, low birth weights or miscarriages.

Most research has examined glyphosate alone, rather than combined with Roundup’s inert ingredients. Researchers who have studied Roundup formulations have drawn conclusions similar to the Seralini group’s. For example, in 2005, University of Pittsburg ecologists added Roundup at the manufacturer’s recommended dose to ponds filled with frog and toad tadpoles.

When they returned two weeks later, they found that 50 to 100 percent of the populations of several species of tadpoles had been killed.

A group of over 250 environmental, health and labor organizations has petitioned the EPA to change requirements for identifying pesticides’ inert ingredients. The agency’s decision is due this fall.
It would be a big step for the agency to take,” said Cox. “But it’s one they definitely should.”

The groups claim that the laws allowing manufacturers to keep inert ingredients secret from competitors are essentially unnecessary. Companies can determine a competitor’s inert ingredients through routine lab analyses, said Cox.

“The proprietary protection laws really only keep information from the public,” she said.

This contains excerpts from original article which can be found: http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=weed-whacking-herbicide...

This article originally ran at Environmental Health News, a news source published by Environmental Health Sciences, a nonprofit media company...…

An Ode to Mary-Kate on Weeds!

humperdink — Mon, 19 Nov 2007 14:34:33 -0800

Don't miss the season finale of Weeds next Monday at 10PM ET/PT.

Police station no place to smoke weed

justingirl1989 — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 07:08:57 -0800

DANBURY, Conn. - A man is facing drug charges after he allegedly walked into the Danbury police station puffing on a marijuana-filled cigar.

Capt. Robert Myles says Scott Snow walked into the station early Saturday and blew smoke from his cigar into a small opening in the bullet-resistant glass separating desk officers from the public.

Myles says the 24-year-old man was told there's no smoking inside the building and he allegedly stubbed out the cigar on the counter.

Officers came out and smelled the distinctive odor of marijuana and arrested Snow.

Police say they found more alleged marijuana in Snow's pants. He has been released after posting bond.

___

Information from: The News-Times, http://www.newstimeslive.com

...uh..duh!!!...

New Group for "Weeds" fans

Whiplash — Sun, 02 Sep 2007 17:04:15 -0700

If you're a fan of "Weeds" on Showtime, feel free to join my group, Little boxes, made of ticky tacky.

I love my boyfriend but don't love his smoking pot addiction

Mon, 20 Jul 2009 10:38:20 -0700

My boyfriend of over 3 years has been smoking pot since he was a teenager. I knew this before we started dating, but really thought he would quit by now. He is now 32 y/o and still smokes multiple times a day. I've already talked to him about how I don't like it at all and wishes he would quit in which he argues it's better to smoke pot than drink alcohol or do other heavier drugs. I see his friends that have a family and they smoke around their babies/toddlers, but I do not our kids [if we ever have any] to be exposed to it. Should I put my foot down harder or just let him have his "hobby"?

Nature's Growth

leeluvfashion — Wed, 05 Dec 2007 00:31:37 -0800

I shot this in b/w at a high ISO; What is your opinion?

He wants to go to bars

Thu, 17 Dec 2009 22:35:08 -0800

I'm going to flat out say that I am insecure, and I know it, but to be honest, I haven't had very great experiences. I've always been told poor things about myself by my parents, people, etc. I've been cheated on by an ex, stolen from, and lied to A LOT.
But, I have this GREAT guy, and I'm young (19) and he's 18. We met each other 4 years ago because a friend of mine told me he was cutting himself and I couldn't believe that such an adorable guy could possibly do that to himself. We've changed each other's lives. We date a year after meeting, and we've broken up twice. I'm his first girlfriend and pretty much his firsts in everything because he's very shy. It's really important to understand that my boyfriend doesn't have very many close friends, and I was his first REAL close friend. He's very shy, but I'm very extroverted and since meeting me, he has changed, not very much, but he does talk to people openly. The first time we broke up it was because he was confused and thought he had feelings for someone else. The second time he broke up with me was because I was stressed about exams and my family was driving me insane, and I took it out on him (not physically, just a really bad argumen). A day after we broke up this time, he got with another girl and made out with her. We weren't dating for 7 months, and during this time he started smoking weed (which I'm completely against) and drinking, and doing a bunch of other stuff. He hit on a couple of girls, but only made out with one girl. During this 7 months we were still having sex and really close. He did a lot of stupid things, and said a lot of hurtful stuff.
He only started drinking when he started working at his job right now. One night while my parents were away he was supposed to pick me up from work because I didn't want to walk home alone, yet he had gone out with people from work and got completely wasted. My bike got stolen in the middle of my shift that night and I ended up walking home alone and nearly got raped but got away. I couldn't go to sleep that night and it was the last night we could actually have to sleep together while my parents were away. He had promised me he would be there. But he never showed and got driven home drunk. Ever since that night he's been trying to make it up to me and we've gotten back together and he's tried to make everything right. But he lies about a lot, and I told him I'm not dating someone that smokes weed, which he's stopped. He told me he hates the clubbing/bar drinking scene and hates crowded places, and I love that. I don't want to date someone that parties all the time, I'm not really into that.. especially if they're not going to bring me.. He even said that if it's more than a beer, he'd bring me. (He's a super lightweight)
Just yesterday though, he said he wanted to and that people ask him to go to these things but he always says he can't because of me.. I don't want to feel like I'm holding him back, but I don't like the idea of bars because I truly feel it's just an excuse for people to hook up. I know he wouldn't be with me if he wanted to sleep with other epople.. but I can't stand feeling like THAT girlfriend. He told me it's not worth arguing over anymore because he doesn't want to go anymore, he just wants to be with me (I told him I didn't want to date someone that parties). I know people like to experiment and stuff.. I have a life outside of him.. but my life includes him, and I truly want us to be together, I guess it's silly, but till we're old, y'know?
I just don't know how to handle letting him go to parties and bars, I want him to bring me, not to watch him, but so we can enjoy it together. I want to know how to get over insecurities and trust him completely.. I just don't know what to do, because I don't want to date anyone that goes drinking often and can't even bring me.

Lost cause cousin?

Tue, 08 Dec 2009 14:50:33 -0800

So this is all about my cousin Lynn. Her mom and my dad are brother and sister, if that makes anything any more clear for you. I'm about four years older than her (I'm 24, she's almost 21) and she has one brother, Ronny Jr, who's 16. Sorry, it's lengthy. I mean really really lenthy, sorry again. I changed the names for privacy's sake, not that it matters.

She had a sort of rough life growing up. Her mother, Selena, told me once, "I could care less about her. Ronny is my golden child." Her father, Ron Sr, was abusive to both her and her mother. They divorced when she was about eight and Selena remarried a man half her age, Shaun, when Lynn was 13.

When she was about ten, her dad choked her and threw her out in the snow. Ronny Jr called Selena and she picked Lynn up and that's when her relationship with her dad disintegrated. Selena has always been a drama queen and Lynn had grown up to be a liar, a thief and drama queen all rolled into one. But I love her anyways. Don't ask why I do or tell me I shouldn't. I do. I love her so much it breaks my heart. Maybe it's because we've got a small family or maybe it's because I think that if I love her enough I'll be able to save her. Maybe it's because she has the same high cheek bones and crooked nose and chubby ankles as me; maybe I think if I can save her I can save myself. Don't ask from what. Even as I type this I know how ridiculous it sounds, but that's how I truly feel.

The last time she talked to her dad- I warn you this is depressing. I mean supremely depressing. I give you full permission to skip this paragraph. Not skipping it? Fine; you've been warned. Ron Sr called Lynn right before Christmas- Dec. 21st- and asked how she was doing. She said, "Fine, my dad is taking me to the movies later today." Ron Sr said, "What do you mean? I'm you're dad." Lynn said, "No you're not. Shaun is." They found Ron Sr's body on Dec. 26th in his hunting cabin up in Wisconsin. He drank himself to death on Christmas. Selena didn't even take her to the funeral. And that was the end of her dad; she was 16.

When she was 18 she moved to Arizona with some guy she barely knew for a couple of months. I wasn't really talking to her then but from what the rest of the family told me- and she confirmed- she was calling every few days having money wired to her. Grandma and Aunt Marissa (my dad's/ her mom's sister) wired her a couple thousand dollars at least. Then she came back home, disappeared for a few months, and resurfaced in the middle of the city, like nothing had even happened.

So she and I had drifted apart for a few years. I had a couch to give away and Selena had mentioned that Lynn needed one, so I got her cell and called her up. She was living in a studio apartment with her puerto-rican thug weed-dealer boyfriend, Rico. Not that his race matters, it was just a shock to see my innocent little cousin all grown up, drinking and smoking cigarettes and rolling blunts and swearing and working dead-end jobs and living with such a bad-ass. We started hanging out and partying together and talking on the phone on a regular basis and became closer than ever, and fast. Of course I wanted her to better her life, but I was in a pretty low point in my life too and I just loved having a girl I could talk to honestly and relate to.

So one morning I check my voicemail and I've got five messages from her crying and saying, "Please, it's an emergency, call bask ASAP." Losing a sock in the laundry is an emergency for this girl, so I call back expecting next-to-nothing. Turns out it was really an emergency this time. Rico had been out and ran into some guy he disliked who said that he and Lynn used to sleep together. When he came home Lynn told him that she had slept with this guy and had lied about it. In a drunken rage, he gave her a black eye and forced her to have sex with him. When she told me this I was furious; I had just gotten out of a similar relationship myself and hated the thought of her going through the same thing. I went to her apartment- he was out 'making money' for the day- I helped her pack a few things and she said she was leaving him forever. He came back while we were there apologizing to her and begging for forgiveness. I got in his face about it- he may be six inches taller and 80 lbs heavier but I was so mad I didn't even care- and he broke down crying. I asked her, "Do you want to make this work or not?" She said yes. What he did was terrible but he seemed genuinely sorry and she wanted to make it work and he was right when he said that she didn't need to be lying all the time- I agreed with that, I was sick of her lying about petty things too. He agreed to go to counseling with her (I don't know if they ever did) and after that incident they seemed happy together. 99% of men don't change after something like that but 1% do, maybe he fit into that 1%. After I got to know him better I thought he was all right. I was always wary of him, but wasn't as bad of a guy as I thought at first.

There was once a couple months later that she had a bruise near her ear and when I asked about it she said it was from a girl at work- she had just gotten fired and I don't think she was lying. Maybe she was. There was another time they got into an argument and when I saw her the next day she was wearing make-up, which she rarely does, but she didn't say anything was wrong and I couldn't see any bruises under her make-up so I figured she was just trying to look good for him because she felt bad for fighting. Who knows. The only thing I know for sure is that it happened once.

They fought and she left him for a few days and went back to Selena's house. She was there for two days and changed her mind and wanted to go back to him. Selena drove Lynn back to Rico's sister-in-law Lucia's house (where they were staying) thinking Lynn just needed to pick up some clothes. When Selena realized Lynn was going to stay she flipped and tried leaving while Lynn was half out of the car. Lynn ended up getting dragged and the neighbors called the police about it. No one got arrested or hurt. Lucia and Lynn walked to the store and supposedly Selena came back later and parked behind the house and tried getting in. I don't know what's true or what's on this one. Just more drama to add to the story, I guess.

So she keeps losing job after job, he keeps thinking he can supporting himself and her selling 1/8ths and dime bags, they keep moving place to place, staying with friends and family and occasionally tricking some landlord into renting them something. She calls me one day ad says, "I just found someone's social security card! Just imagine what I can do with that info!" I say to her, "Lynn, be careful. Don't get yourself in trouble." I don't think she did anything with it. I dont' know.

Now this girl, I have never known anyone to go through phone numbers as fast as her. She'd either be with a friend using their phone or getting a prepaid phone and then not being able to afford it. Then she calls me one day, "I just got cell phones for me and Rico's family using my mom's social." I say, "Lynn, don't you think that's a bad idea, don't you think she'll find out?" She says, "Not if I pay it on time she won't." And I think to myself, Lynn you can't keep a number more than a month, how the hell do you expect to pay a plan with five lines? Which of course she can't afford it after more than a couple of months. Selena never called me to ask and I never called her to rat Lynn out either. When you're loyal to both sides the best thing to do is keep your mouth shut and hope they don't ask. Right?

Over the two and a half years I was around her again I probably loaned her less than $100. Listen to this a remember it: never loan out any money you're not willing to part with. Of course she never paid me back, it was always, "Rico has it," (he never did) or "When I get my next check," (spent before she got a chance to repay me).

So she calls me one day and says, "Rico just got busted." He was riding with his friend. They got pulled over and the friend had '140 unit doses of Heroin as well as over 40 grams of Cocaine' according to the police blotter. They both got charged with everything. This is Rico's second time busted for intent to distribute- he's facing major prison time. So he gets a public defender and keeps getting continuance after continuance. As far as I know he was only selling weed. I tested him a couple of times before this because I wasn't sure- asking for this or that just to see if he could get it. He never could. I'll never know the truth, though. Maybe he said he couldn't because he knew I was testing him. They got married the day of his arraignment.

So she gets a job at a major hard-ware store, and a few weeks later, stops calling me. I try her last five phone numbers and they're all disconnected. Grandma tells me, "Lynn called me last week looking for pain pills." I google her name and the county she's living in and I see why- she's been charged with 'purchasing $550 in gift cards with a customer's (name of hardware store) credit card...' which boils down to 'theft and misuse of credit cards.' One is a 1st degree misdemeanor and the other I think is a 5th degree felony. This was late June. According to the county court website, she got a public defender, but stopped showing up for her court dates. I was going to call Rico but I figured if she wants to talk to me she'll call me- she's got my number memorized. I erased his number out of my phone so I wouldn't even be tempted to call him.

Turns out , too, that she took a bunch of credit cards out in Selena's name and ran them up and never paid. I don't know if Selena's going to press charges or not. Lynn never ripped me off but then again I never gave her the opportunity, either.

She called Grandma a few weeks back, saying Rico got some chick pregnant and they're getting annulled and she staying in some shelter in the city. Grandma (feisty woman she is) says, "Lynn you haven't called in so long I thought you were dead." When Grandma asks if she's been in any trouble, she lies and says no. Then she gets to the point and says she needs $150 to get her GED and go to nursing school. Grandma tells her, "Lynn, you can't go six months without calling anyone and then expect me to give you $150!" And that was the end of the conversation.

So I've been wondering if she'll ever call me, and Thanksgiving she did. She left a message saying, "Happy Thanksgiving and say Hi to you mom's side of the family." Out of no where, didn't say anything about how she's been doing, nothing. I call the number back and it goes to the voicemail of some guy named Ross. I know that's a common enough name but Rico has a friend named Ross and I met him once. He's a limo driver and he was hitting on me- he wasn't that great of a guy anyway- but I find out later he's married! Lynn and Rico were living in a hotel for a while and Ross was living there (in his own room with his wife) and from what the desk girl told me the cops came knocking on Ross's door once and he freaked out and jumped out the second story window and broke his ankle. When we got up to the room I asked Rico about it he didn't want to talk about it. I was going to leave a message but just in case it was the same Ross, I didn't. I don't want that guy to have my number.

So that's it. That's where I am now. I don't know what sort of advice I want. Stop worrying, maybe? There's nothing I can do, perhaps? I don't know. Maybe I just needed to vent. Any sort of advice or constructive comments would be appreciated. Thanks.

Remedies for Male Libido Enhancer

herbalcure30 — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 21:04:03 -0800

When looking at low libido we need to look at main problems that men have low libido and each of them the good news is there are natural supplements to help with problems. You can repair you libido naturally and here we'll look at how...Herbs are good at healing libido, because not only not only lead to better sexual health - but an overall improvement in wellness. It does not work in isolation from the rest of the body and increase your overall health repairs your sexual drive. Today many manufacturers are blending potent sexual pill, complete with all the herbs listed below in one convenient service.So here are some problems and herbs to combat them proved:Mental State- The psychological causes of lack of libido in men are numerous, but the most common are stress, lack of energy and general fatigue. The problem is if the body is low on energy, it uses what it has to sexual and other matters, is not a place in your list.Horny Goat Weed is an excellent addition here and fights stress and increases energy levels natural organs. Another great herb is Tribulus Terrestris Extract. A favorite athlete serious about their energy boosts that want to improve quality, performance, and increases sexual energy.Hormones- Androgens such as testosterone are an important factor for the expression of male libido. Testosterone levels turn down about 1% each year in men, which may contribute to lower male libido with aging. Substitution of androgens can be helpful in men with age-related sexual dysfunction and impotence problem.Mucuna pruriens or Kapikachhu is another good herb to take. The high levels of L-dopa, which is converted into dopamine, which stimulates the release of testosterone in the body. L-dopa and dopamine are also effective inhibitors of prolactin, high concentrations of prolactin are thought to be responsible for 70% of all failures of erection in men.Vascular problems- Changes in blood flow to the male organ and are from a common cause of male erectile dysfunction, but not necessarily libido. For example, medical conditions such as arteriosclerosis (hardening of the arteries), high cholesterol, hypertension, diabetes or reduce blood flow to the male organYou need a strong flow and here is a great herb Tentex forte. The herb improves blood flow and oxygen throughout the body, while also working for her, protect blood vessels and reduce atherosclerotic lesions. The herb Tentex forte is also an excellent blood tonic and also plays a key role in the next issue we analyze.Putting it all together:Herbs are especially effective when combined and experience poor libido. There not only the herbs you can use a combination, but as they are excellent for repairing libido naturally and many herbal sexual pills are available with the above combination. Take them and sexual and overall well-being will improve.Get more useful information on low libido and low sex drive enhancer products. And also get remedies to increase low sex libido.

Gifts That Need Forgiving

stephley — Wed, 16 Dec 2009 12:44:55 -0800

Last year, Lindsay Demma Gibson was thrilled to find a stocking and, under the tree, several carefully wrapped gifts from her husband Christmas morning.

That is, until she opened them.

Ms. Gibson, an elementary-school teacher, had been hoping for her favorite perfume, new boots or a nice purse.

Instead, her husband gave her golf gloves, a golf skirt and a golf shirt with a country-club logo on it-even though she rarely hits the links. He also presented her with a heating pad, Listerine breath strips and generic nasal strips to prevent snoring.

"I never got gifts like that before," says Ms. Gibson, who lives near Hershey, Pa. "It looked as if my husband was buying for a 70-year-old lady riddled with arthritis and face-crinkling halitosis, not me, his lovely 34-year-old bride who practices good oral hygiene."

I hate to be the one to tell you this, but your mother was wrong: It doesn't matter one bit if you were naughty or nice all year. Chances are, at some point in your marriage or relationship, your partner is going to give you a bad gift. And although it might not be quite as traumatic as the time you asked Santa for a Nintendo set and got a Boggle game instead, it's still going to sting.

It's one of the holiday season's unexpected traps: Just at the time of year when we're trying hard to be on our best behavior, the wrong gift can strain our marriage bonds.

Kirk Gibson, giver of the breath-freshener and antisnoring strips, admits that he erred on the side of practical last year, but says that some of the presents were meant to make his wife laugh. "My problem is I didn't follow them up with a real gift," says Mr. Gibson, a 33-year-old organizational development consultant who has been married not quite three years.

Of course, gifts between couples can backfire in either direction. But-please don't shoot the messenger-men seem to be more clueless than women.

Women tend to care more about gifts. They shop more, and think more about them. They attach more emotion to them. And they can be more demanding and less direct. (If I ask my husband what he wants for the holidays, he will say "nothing" and mean it. If he asks me, I will say "nothing," as well. And God help him if he believes me.)

Making matters even worse: When it comes to bad gifts, women have the memory of elephants. Take Donna Clark Goodrich. In 1962, she asked her husband for a recording of Handel's "Messiah." Instead, he got her a parody LP of the Kennedy family by impressionist Vaughn Meader. "I've never let my husband live that Christmas down," says Ms. Goodrich, 71, a writer in Mesa, Ariz.

When I began asking people about gifts they received from significant others that had gone awry, examples poured in-all of them from women. (Perhaps tellingly, many of these bad-gift stories involved former husbands.)

There were tales of men who gave their wives electric brooms, washcloths and cheese graters, cosmetic surgery, weed wackers and AC/DC box sets. One wife told of receiving a child's toy dishwasher-she had asked for a real one-and immediately bursting into tears. Another said she opened a case of Chapstick. A third recounted how she received a size 9 pair of men's tennis shoes. (She wears a women's size 6.)

Once, Cherie Jorgensen, a 32-year-old event planner in Detroit, had a boyfriend who made her a romantic Christmas dinner. He then gave her a super-absorbent hair towel and a man's bath wrap while they were cuddling in front of the tree. "Needless to say, he is no longer in the picture," she says.

Angela Lopez received a mass-market poem from her husband about the meaning of the name "Angela," decorated with a gray wolf on a blue-violet background. "I felt a little panicked," says Ms. Lopez, 38, who owns two sandwich shops with her husband in San Diego. "We were starting a business together, and it made me think, 'Are we even on the same page?'"

You shouldn't need a gift consultant (or a marriage counselor) to tell you these presents are wrong. They're utilitarian. Unromantic. Ugly. And, in many cases, more suitable for a man, or a cleaning woman, than the love of your life.

In his new book, "Scroogenomics," Wharton School economist Joel Waldfogel estimates that the gifts others buy for us are worth 20% less to us than the gifts we buy for ourselves. But of all the people on our holiday lists, he says, the ones we are best at picking out gifts for are spouses and significant others. That's because, presumably, we know these people best.

Then why so many bad gifts within couples?

It's simple, really. Sometimes men aren't listening to their wives. But just as often, women aren't clear about their desires. They want men to pick up on their subtle clues, rather than telling them outright what they'd like. As one woman I know explains, "It means we are special to them if they detect what we want without us telling them."

Tom Valentino, who grew up in a large Italian-American family, blames his upbringing. In his parents' house, Christmas was all about religious values-and food. Gifts were an afterthought.

Flash ahead a few decades, when Mr. Valentino, an accountant, had to pick out a holiday gift for his wife. "I started to think, well, we have three kids already, so no need for anything from Victoria's Secret," he says. "And I bought her a fancy watch last year for her birthday. How many of those does she need?"

Then he remembered his wife had said she needed a vacuum and a bigger pasta pot. Off to Macy's he went. "I could almost smell the sauce cooking with meatballs, sausage and braciole," he says. "How could a woman not be happy with these?"

He found out, because the gifts made his wife cry. "The worst part of it all were the looks the kids gave me," says Mr. Valentino, 52, who lives in Cheshire, Conn. "It's been about 15 years, and I can't tell you how many times I've been reminded of those gifts."

And there's the rub. When men receive gifts they hate, they typically shrug them off. Women, faced with the same dilemma, feel hurt.

What did it for Susan Wilson? A nightgown her husband bought a number of years ago for their anniversary and presented to her at a cozy dinner for two at their country club.

It was cotton (the scratchy kind). Extra-large (she is a size four). Wrapped in a Wal-Mart bag. And emblazoned with St. Bernards carrying snowballs in their mouths.

Ms. Wilson, 54, a business consultant in Stevensville, Mich., was speechless. "You could fit three Peyton Mannings in it," she says, adding that the thoughtlessness of the gift made her feel unappreciated. As a result, the rest of the evening did not go as her husband had planned. "He made me feel like a dog, but he went to the kennel."

Her husband's rationale: His wife loves dogs. "I thought I was being creative," says Doug Wilson, 55, a corporate environmental health and safety director. "And I always think of sleepwear as something you want to be cozy and not real tight."

So what's a well-meaning spouse to do? Start with these gift-giving tips:

• When in doubt, go down a size.

• Never give a gift that suggests your spouse is not perfect. No unsolicited exercise equipment, self-help books, wrinkle cremes or nose-hair removers.

• Appliances and cookware are OK only if she asks for them.

• Don't even think about a gift that you will get more enjoyment out of than your spouse.

• Remember: It's not just the thought that counts-especially if you didn't have that thought until the checkout line.

• When all else fails, at least try to create memories.

That's what Ms. Gibson, the Pennsylvania teacher, is expecting this year. Recently a package arrived for her husband, who likes do his holiday shopping online. Who sent it? DrNatura, a company known for its colonics.

"Is my dear husband intending to give me a colon cleanser for Christmas this year?" says Ms. Gibson, who says she immediately started to think of all the silly jokes she would share with him, such as "Out with the old, in with the new."

"At this point, getting perfect, well-thought-out gifts seems a little boring. Bring on the bad gifts, honey."

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1000142405274870395490457459587290313703...