SavvySugar

5 Money Issues Every Couple Should Prepare For

SavvySugar — Fri, 13 Nov 2009 08:30:33 -0800

We talk about love and money quite a bit here on Savvy, and many of you have had a go-round or two with your significant other about the topic. In a new relationship, resolving money issues means adjusting to each other’s spending and saving styles, and coming up with a system you can both live with. But as relationships grow and change, financial situations do too, and many couples find themselves having to adjust their approach to money after years of marriage.

New York Times columnist Ron Lieber recently offered up a list of five issues that can cause financial bickering even in established relationships. To see them, along with my advice for how to address them, click away.

View Slideshow ›

How-To: Determine If You Can Live on One Income

SavvySugar — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 08:30:15 -0700

There are too many families who were taken by surprise when one breadwinner suddenly lost his or her job, but some couples might choose to give up an income for one reason or another. Maybe one person was offered a job in another city, leaving the other one without employment, the couple wants one parent to stay home with the kids, one half of the duo is miserable at work and wants out ASAP, etc. Before you make the choice to live on one income, you need to find out if it's a viable option by following these steps.

View Slideshow ›

Would You Ever Job Swap With Your Partner?

SavvySugar — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 12:00:10 -0700

In an admittedly gutsy career move, Susan Barton will be taking over her husband's job at Slate for two weeks. The experiment, a kind of real-world take on Freaky Friday - and aptly titled Freaky Fortnight - details the adventures of this 30-something mom and her husband switching roles - Susan taking to the office at Slate as an editor, and her husband taking the reigns at home to care for their two children.

It's a brave attempt at experiencing daily life in someone else's shoes. At a certain point, our own routines have become second nature, and it's impossible to know exactly where another career path would take us, how it would affect us, and how we would fare. So, despite the occasional wishful thinking to experience life as a movie star or dream job of your choice, tell me, would you ever seriously consider switching jobs with your partner?

I'm Asking: Do You Fight With Friends Over the Check?

SavvySugar — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 12:00:15 -0700

On this week's Curb Your Enthusiasm Larry David gets in a heated argument that escalates into a physical fight with Rosie O'Donnell over their lunch bill. Larry insists he invited her and should therefore foot the bill, and Rosie declares she put her hand on it first so it's on her. Pretty soon the two are yelling, wrestling for the check and causing a gigantic scene. Comedic genius. Have things ever gotten this heated when you tried to take the bill?

Back to Basics: Balancing Love and Money

SavvySugar — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 09:00:54 -0700

Love and marriage may go together, but love and money don't always. Thirty percent of Americans, 23 percent of Canadians, 24 percent of the French, and 12 percent of Germans say the recession has added stress to or ruined their relationship or marriage. These are startling stats, especially when you consider only 11 percent of SavvySugar readers say they have never fought with their spouse over money. Check out some tips for balancing career, finances, and love, and share your thoughts on the topic!

Become a More Financially Compatible Couple	10 Tips For Balancing Love and Money	Is It Harder to Make Ends Meet When You're Single?
The Marriage Penalty, Explained	Couples' Financial Conversation Starters	How to Manage Money as a Couple

For additional polls on all things love and money, read more.

Do You Spend Without Checking in With Your Husband?	Have You Dated a Guy Because of His Money?	Is Bad Credit a Dealbreaker in Serious Relationships?
Could You Work With Your Husband?	Would You Get a Joint Checking Account With Your Boyfriend?	How Do You Feel About Prenups?

Wall Street's $25,000 Matchmaker Talks About Who's Hot

SavvySugar — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 06:31:17 -0700

In the good ol' days, finance types had a leg up on the competition by simple virtue of their monetarily rewarding professions. Now, according to matchmaker Samantha Daniels, the playing field is a bit more level because of the economic changes during the past year. Daniels' services can cost upwards of $25,000 and, despite the recession, she says her business is booming because people are yearning for stability in their personal lives.

Instead of approaching the matchmaker with a blind eye for anyone but bankers, Daniels says women are requesting to be set up with men from a variety of professions - including, but not exclusively, guys who work in finance. She's receiving more inquiries for men who are in more traditional, yet well-paid, careers, like lawyers, doctors, and business owners. Interestingly, Daniels notes, "I find that people who work in finance tend to not want to date each other."

Men, on the other hand, continue to ask for women who "look like supermodels but have Harvard educations," except now they're concerned about being paired up with a woman who's also supportive. Daniels speculates that these guys witnessed some of their colleagues relationships blow up right along with the economy, and they want a partner who will stand by them through any economy.

Ask Savvy: My Husband Spends More Money Than He Should

SavvySugar — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 10:30:10 -0700

Dear Savvy,

My husband and I share a bank account. We both work (he makes more money than I do) and it was his idea to combine bank accounts when we got married a year ago. The combined money situation was going smoothly until recently, when he started spending like he did when he was single.

He used to be a pretty bad impulse shopper but improved so much over the course of our six-year relationship - now, it seems like he's falling into old habits, but this time it affects me. I'm not someone you'd call super frugal, but I'm also acutely aware of how I spend our money. How can I talk to him about this without making him feel like I'm trying to parent him?

Savvy says: Your man's defenses might spike when you start a conversation about his spending, so instead of placing blame on him and starting a fight, find a way to pin-point the problem without a lot of finger-pointing. See my advice when you read more.

Begin the conversation by saying that you've noticed the bank account has been lighter than usual, and you think it would be a good idea to look at your transaction history together to see where your money is going. If you use an online money management system (like Mint), this will be an even easier process. If not just take the time to itemize transactions from the last month or two. Categorize your expenses as an online system would, looking for grocery, gas, household bills, and of course, retail purchases.

When it becomes obvious that your man has been spending more than he should, ask him if he thinks it would be a good idea for you both to have your own smaller accounts for discretionary purchases while using the joint account for shared expenses. Say that because there are two of you using one account, it makes it difficult to really pay attention to where your money is going and it would make it easier for you to track your own expenses. You could automatically transfer a certain amount of money into your individual accounts on paydays.

Because you and your husband have different spending profiles, I really think the best idea is for you to get separate accounts to use as you wish. If your husband blows through his personal account and starts using the joint account for his shopping habit, then you can have to have another, more serious, conversation about your shared financial goals.

Have a question for me? Ask away by posting your questions in my Ask Savvy group.

Who Brings Home More Bacon: You or Your Honey?

SavvySugar — Tue, 01 Sep 2009 14:44:06 -0700

We know what tradition says about who puts the bread on the table, but I want to know, who brings home more bacon in your relationship?

Source: Flickr User robotsari

Study Shows Spendthrifts and Tightwads Tend to Marry

SavvySugar — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 06:30:58 -0700

Here's one case when birds of a feather often do not flock together, but they probably should. Researchers at the University of Pennsylvania, the University of Michigan, and Northwestern University rated married individuals on a Tightwad-Spendthrift Scale based on surveys that asked each partner about their personal feelings toward spending money.

The results show that many people end up marrying someone with opposite money behavior. Professor Stephanie Coontz commented, "I can see how this might be one of those kinds of seductive differences in the early stages of courtship. Maybe you say to yourself, ‘This guy makes me feel so free,’ or ‘This gal reins me in.’ " I never thought of money habits as a seductive element in the kindling of a relationship, but I do see Coontz's point.

Unfortunately, the initial attraction to another's differences in the way they handle finances could lead to big trouble down the road. Relationship experts think people end up with opposites because they don't spend enough time discussing money before they walk down the aisle. Eli J. Finkel, a Northwestern psychology professor, said, "People may not think about these things when they first get married. But a bad economy serves as a crucible for complementary marriages."

Would You Buy Property With a Boyfriend or Partner?

SavvySugar — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 06:30:32 -0700

When it comes to real estate and major financial decisions there's no one right way to do things. Each person's financial needs, abilities, and goals are completely unique. Last week when Reggie Bush and Kim Kardashian split, she noted they were looking at houses together right before the breakup, but that she didn't want to live with someone until she's engaged. Considering she probably doesn't need a co-signer, it's safe to assume Kim's reasoning is largely emotional, moral, or simply because that's what she wants.

The dilemma of buying a home or sharing a mortgage with a partner is one I hear all the time from 20- and 30-something friends who, unlike Kim, don't have the financial resources that will allow them to buy a home solo. Would you (or have you) ever sign a mortgage with someone you weren't married to?