Is It Rude to Invite People to an Engagement Party and Not the Wedding?

Ask a Savvy Bride: Is It OK to Invite Guests to Engagement Party and Not Wedding?


Updated 06/03/11 5:20 AM · Posted by SavvySugar · 6 comments

Wedding etiquette can be tricky, like this question below, so be sure to ask our Savvy Bride your questions in the Ask Savvy group.

Dear Savvy,

My fiancé and I are trying to be as smart with our money as possible while planning our upcoming wedding. We need to keep it small, but like most weddings, the list keeps growing and growing. I was venting to a co-worker the other day and she suggested that we invite more people to our engagement party and less to our wedding. I was always under the impression that that was a big no no, but have I been wrong this whole time?

Penny Pinching Penelope

To see the savvy bride's advice, read on.

Savvy bride says:

I happen to think that brides and grooms should only invite people to their prewedding festivities (even the bachelor/bachelorette parties) if they will be invited to the actual wedding. While it might make financial sense for you to do otherwise, you're liable to really hurt the guests' feelings; they might even think all you wanted was a gift! In addition to that, you'd be putting the person hosting the engagement party out — another head jacks up the price for them as much as it would for you.

If your list keeps growing, try to come up with some strict ground rules to keep the number down, for instance no plus ones, inviting close friends and immediate family only, or consider having a destination wedding — that will surely cut your list down significantly. Hope this helps and hope you have an amazing day!

Ask anything budget-, etiquette-, or planning-related — well, almost anything — by posting your questions in the Ask Savvy group, and I'll find the right expert to help you out. If you are planning a wedding, already happily wed, or still looking for Mr. Right, start sharing your big day with our community. Don’t forget to check the wedding content box on your post.

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