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Talking About Money As an Engaged Couple

Fri, 04/04/2008 - 2:17pm by SavvySugar
1,974 Views - 9 comments

For many couples, handling a wedding budget is the first big money conversation of the relationship. Sure, a lot of couples live together pre-engagement and have household expenses to pay, but there's a big difference between splitting the cable bill and considering both yours and his priorities in terms of shared money. He wants to arrive in the stretch Hummer with his boys, but you want the wedding day Jimmy Choos and your wedding budget can't handle both — these are just smaller versions of what you'll have to tackle together financially in the near future. To see which money topics you should cover before saying "I Do" just read more.

Whether you plan on waiting until you're married to combine bank accounts, get a joint credit card, or if you intend on keeping all income separate, these issues needs to be addressed before the wedding. These topics aren't always easy to discuss, especially if the two of you have differing opinions, or if one of you has a much higher income, but this is one conversation that can't wait until you're a Mrs. Because whether or not you'll be combining funds, at least to some extent, you'll definitely be making financial decisions together throughout your marriage. Step one is figuring out how to organize the money that will be used in these decisions.

Talk about the state of your money. You owe it to your fiancé to be honest about any outstanding debt and he has the same responsibility to you. Figure out where you stand creditwise as a couple and make a plan to pay off the debt. It's especially important to decide how you'll handle any debt that you've acquired before marriage — will you pay it off together or should you keep enough in a separate account to make your own personal debt payments?

The third topic to cover before walking down the aisle is setting expectations for the future. While for some couples this may be common sense, for others it seems like it doesn't need to be talked about because the answers are simply understood. But assumptions can be very wrong, so you need to have an open discussion about where both of you see yourselves careerwise and if one of you wants to stay home with any future children. Get this stuff out of the way now and your newlywed selves will start off on the right feet.

To see all of our wedding coverage, check out IDoSugar.com.

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9 Comments Add a Comment

  • princessjaslew's picture
    princessjaslew
    1

    too many couples i know are so focused on the wedding they really don't talk about all the impt stuff before the big day. so great tips.

    39 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment
  • lacourt's picture
    lacourt
    2

    I don't want to sound like a btch, but DUH. Some concrete tips migh t be more useful.

    39 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment
  • hotstuff's picture
    hotstuff
    3

    I've heard that couples should hand over their credit reports to each other. That could be....eye opening!

    39 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment
  • sodria's picture
    sodria
    4

    we have a joint account, but we still have our separate accounts. We made a wedding budget from the beginning and paid cash for our wedding. We didn't fluctuate from it and our wedding turned out great. We're glad it's all paid for!

    39 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment
  • hmcmcd's picture
    hmcmcd
    5

    I wish this wedding budget stuff was put in the IDo sugar section and leave this section for more mainstream money/savvy articles.

    39 weeks 4 days ago Report Comment
  • SavvySugar's picture
    SavvySugar
    6

    lacourt-

    For some people, these are concrete tips. While for you they may seem like common sense, for others they're not so obvious. So many couples get divorced because they never talked about money before they were married, and the arguments based around money are what lead to the downfall of their marriage. These arguments could have been avoided by couples getting to know each other's money habits before they tied the knot.

    Savvy

    39 weeks 3 days ago Report Comment
  • JaimeLeah526's picture
    JaimeLeah526
    7

    It's really important to talk about this well before the wedding. Don't wait until the wedding planning stage to discuss money. Luckily my husband and I had similar financial plans and he's really good about helping me save money.

    One thing that always frustrates me about my hubby is that he never checks our accounts and never knows the balance and just says we cannot afford it. He's usually pleasantly surprised when I tell him we can. Make sure you tell your S.O what is important to you as far as money is concerned. This is something that he may not know bothers me unless I tell him.

    39 weeks 3 days ago Report Comment
  • tiff58's picture
    tiff58
    9

    My fiance and I have had some major blowouts over money. We live together and share expenses, and are becoming more and more on the same page about money- and we are SO MUCH happier because of it. We are now actually having level-headed conversations about money. It's amazing! Smiling

    39 weeks 2 days ago Report Comment

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